Previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
You are standing at the gate to the temple of Tiamat.
I mean we might want to hop on that giant owl and just fly up to that window we saw
earlier.
Guys, I see a person down there, like one of the sacrifices.
I mean they might have a way in for us.
What's your name?
Merv.
I was trying to make my way to a tunnel that we've been led to before on the
other side of this caldera here.
There is a long stretch, a long corridor that you follow with no other turns and it
ends with a door in the ceiling.
You see across the way Red Wizard standing looking up as the one in front of you
is.
Yes, I'm going to take my shot.
Because he did not see this coming, his head falls to the ground.
In the blink of an eye, Thea runs up and she disappears and is immediately on the
other side.
This is a wizard you haven't seen since you were aboard the frost giant's floating
fortress.
This wizard is Wrath Modar.
I'm going to cast Hail of Thorns, it's a bonus action.
As the arrow passes this shimmering globe and springs to action 10 feet in front of him
but is shattered and disperses as the arrow continues to go through and hit him in the
shoulder.
Oh, it's maybe like a little anti-magic shield.
You are too, mate.
Tiamat will destroy you soon.
Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons, we're a D&D 5th edition actual play podcast and I am your
dungeon master Russ More and with me today is Carla Johnson.
Did you just say Rush More?
Oh, he so did.
It's a really good movie.
I love Wes Anderson, he's great.
It's a really fun movie so I can see why you would want to be Rush More.
Yeah, if you're going for a Sean Connery kind of thing, I'm Rush More.
Anyway, sorry, sorry, Russ.
No, that's fine.
I didn't realize I said it.
I play New Laura Moonbrook.
And Amy More.
I wasn't going to say anything and I play Thea Anastasia.
And Tom Laird.
I really like Jason Schwartzman in Rush More, he's delightful.
Me too, he's great.
Well, yeah, he's delightful in general.
I've never actually seen Rush More.
What?
You need to watch that movie, Russ.
And I play Flint Firebeard.
Is that the one where she puts her hands in her armpits or is that a different
one?
That's Superstar.
Wow, that is radically different.
Yeah, very different.
This doesn't sound like a very good movie.
That's the one I'm thinking of.
It wasn't a very good movie.
Sorry, Molly Shannon, but mm-mm.
No, haven't seen Rush More.
So my homework for next week.
If you want homework, you can come over to Patreon, Patreon.com slash dumb dragon
cast.
Hey, we've given our patrons lots of homework over time.
It's not a necessity, but it's something that just ends up happening when you come
to our Gook Hangs, which happens every month.
We all have like, you know, things that we love and things that we talk about and on
both sides.
And people end up with, you know, things to do before the next one.
So yeah, Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
Come get some homework.
Yeah, or but don't let that like dissuade you from coming.
You don't have to do homework.
It's good homework.
It's voluntary homework.
It's voluntary.
Yeah.
If you hate homework, it's okay.
We don't kick you out if you don't do it.
No, it's totally fine.
No.
But also when you're a patron, you get an episode dedicated to you and today's
episode is dedicated to a and ninety four.
Thanks.
And and ninety four and it's the user name they decided to go with.
So that's what I like.
And thank you.
And if you want to become a patron, come join us over on Patreon.
That's all I got.
So fuck it.
Let's play D&D.
A boulder flies through the air released by a dwarven trebuchet.
The wine of the falling stone rings out as it lands in the midst of cult mercenaries
and ravenous devils, a sickening mix of blood, bone and dirt fly up into the air.
We see Elven Bladesingers weightlessly moving through the crowds as if dancing across the
water, clearing the way, pressing further towards the Well of Dragons.
In behind them, we see Lady Leral Silverhand atop a hippogriff.
At her side, Dagult Neverember and Delaine Winterhound skim above the mass of soldiers,
Their eyes set on the glowing spire at the center of Tiamat's temple.
Inside the caldera, we see the crashed floating iceberg of a palace.
Dragons and frost giants battle, multiple dragons coming down, picking up the frost
giants and throwing them hundreds of feet.
Frost giants throw their clubs and ice boulders up at these dragons, bringing them down and
beating them into the ground.
As we watch this battle, slowly the palace begins to vibrate and move.
It is broken into several pieces, but the largest of those pieces begins to lift
off the ground, making its way towards the temple.
Inside, Flint and Nularaaaa are charging toward Wrathmodar, the leader of the exiled red wizards.
Thea, her back to the giant bard entrance to the temple, squaring off against a wizard,
when suddenly, there is a crash.
Thea, make a dexterity saving throw, please.
Oh no, you're straight off the fucking bat, I'm going to use one of my lucks.
I really rolled a 19.
Hearing the explosion, Thea looks up and sees Rubble falling towards her.
From each of the spires, you look and you see coming down and around the wizards
and Thea dive out of the way just in time, Rubble fall to the ground right where she was standing.
You look up and you see, 50 feet above you, red wizards casting the ritual to rise to
the mat, floating in each of the spires.
High above the center, the floor falls out and falls to the ground by Flint and Nularaaaa.
You look up and you see suspended in the center of the energy, a floating figure, 100 feet
above you, adorned with a terrifying and magnificent five-color dragon mask.
The booming voice you heard before emanates again.
Decimators of dragons, how nice to see you again.
After all this time, sadly it will be the last as we near the final steps in
bringing our queen to this world.
High Severin Silveration will be inconvenienced no longer by your putrid attempts to halt
this ritual.
Severin rejoins the chant as the five colors begin to grow stronger and you feel a shift
in the very earth itself.
We're back to the top of the order, so you...
What was the order?
Nularaaaa is up first.
Okay.
So to set the scene, you are about 40 feet from Rath Modar who you have seen has a
globe around him preventing any magics you presume from hitting him.
Flint is beside you as is Donnie and Thea is engaged in battle with a wizard down
the spire with the blue energy.
Not getting crushed by rocks.
You now know that there are five other wizards up atop these spires.
The only way you can presume to get up to them is by flying and Severin is directly
above you.
Choices.
Okay, well, the thing is, just one person so I can only deal with one thing.
So can Donnie go first instead of me or does he have to go after me?
God, I don't see why not.
We've never done it that way, but I mean, I see no reason why you couldn't.
You could just...
Yeah, I think he just goes on my turn, right?
Mechanically, we would just say Nularaaaa delays her actions until Donnie takes his
turn, so...
Well, that's what I'm gonna do.
Do whatever you want.
Because Donnie, last time, had recharged his fire breath.
Yep.
He wants to try and fire breath Rath Modar.
Beautiful.
He's gonna take his movement and then he is going to do his fire breath.
So that is a dex save.
Dexterity saving throw.
That's a 22.
Geez, he's dexterous as fuck.
But that's okay.
He still takes half damage.
So 20, so 10 fire damage.
Okay.
I am going to use my fleet of foot as a bonus action to dash and then also
make my movement so that I can get over to him.
Because luckily, magic damage doesn't work and I don't really do great at
magic anyway, so let's just try and sword this motherfucker.
There you go.
Right?
I am going to swing Dragon Slayer at Rath Modar.
And that is a 27.
Doesn't hit.
Fuck, guys, we're so fucked.
Well, we're done.
That's just one of the wizards, guys.
Definitely hits.
Okay.
So that is 12 piercing or slashing or whatever and then 6 magic.
So I guess maybe magic probably doesn't work.
So it's 12 and 6, 18?
Yes.
Donnie's fire breath hits the duplicate mirror image.
Duplicate vaporizes.
Nularaaaa runs forward, hitting the only left-standing Rath Modar with her sword.
And then that second verse is going to be the same as the first.
It's going to be a little bit louder.
25.
Yes.
And that is a 12 and 6, so 18.
Again.
Very consistent.
Different combo, though.
Different numbers.
Oh, wow.
It's a cool 36 points of damage.
Yeah.
Yeah, worked out pretty good.
I'm so much better with a weapon up close than trying to do spells on people in
bubbles because I forget they're in bubbles because I don't even pay attention to
the magic anymore.
Never do it.
Guys, we need to pay attention to magic.
I know.
It's true.
I've been saying this all along.
It's true.
Thea is great at paying attention to magic.
All right.
Let's go.
Thea, you're up.
Okay.
I am.
Okay.
Sorry, I didn't quite understand your description of the red wizards that are
up.
Is it on a ledge?
They're essentially directly above where the current wizards are.
Oh, okay.
And I will review.
Oh, this is a giant up column, right?
Yep.
Okay, cool.
Cool, cool, cool, cool.
Okay.
I'm not into these Call to the Dragon people, but like you got to admit their
ceremonies look pretty dope.
Yeah, they got some style.
Yeah.
They do.
So I guess what I'm going to do, I'm going to Eldritch Blast because it can
go 120 feet.
I'm going to Eldritch Blast the asshole above me, main dude.
Okay.
What's the name again?
Main dude?
Well, you got to move then because you're currently within the spire, which
mean you mean you're further than 150 feet away from him.
Like you, you know, Pythagorean theorem, because he's a hundred feet above
here.
You're another 300 feet over there.
Never mind.
I'll Eldritch Blast this bitch in front of me.
Okay.
Let's do that instead, because there's no way my hundred feet is going to
move.
Okay.
21, 22.
Yep.
The other one is 16.
Yep.
Oh, 12.
12 does not hit.
Yeah.
All right.
2D10s.
So that's 15 damage altogether.
Force damage.
With the sustaining damage he took from before, the Eldritch Blast come
forward and hit him directly in the chest and throw him against the wall
and he falls dead to the ground.
I yell over, guys, I killed one of them.
Can we air five?
Oh, 100%.
Absolutely.
Can I take a movement after I do an action?
Can I move after?
Absolutely.
I'd like to just move my however far that I can, which is 30 feet
closer to the middle of the spire.
Severin is up next and he continues the ritual to bring Tiamat forward.
Wrath Modar is next.
This guy.
This guy, right?
This fucking guy.
This guy.
He smiles at you, Nulara.
That's never good.
No, it's never great.
He moves his hands through the air and mutters a evil-sounding thing
under his breath that you don't quite understand.
But you must make a wisdom saving throw.
Okay.
Pla two, Virata, Nick two, et cetera, et cetera.
Something, something, something, dark side.
Yeah.
That is a 10.
10?
Okay, great.
At the start of your turns for the duration, which is up to one minute,
you must roll a D10.
You have succumbed to the Confusion spell and Wrath gets to strike out
and swing at you with his quarter staff as well.
That's going to be a 19 to hit.
Yeah, that'll do it.
Is your armor still juiced or is it run out now?
The armor is, like, always good.
It's just the no damage only lasts for 10 minutes,
but it still will be half on non-magic.
Okay.
So you're going to take seven bludgeoning damage.
So three.
Whatever.
Some more wizard's turns and they continue to cast the ritual around you.
And Flint, you are next.
How far away from Wrath am I?
About 40 feet again?
30 feet?
Approximately.
Yeah, approximately 30.
I guess I will have to dash then,
because I can only technically move 25 feet.
So as you get to him.
I go the long way around Nulara.
Okay.
Yeah, no, that's fine.
I mean, if I got this extra movement, I might as well use it, right?
Might as well just kind of run around them.
Just a couple circles.
Right.
Well, it would make sense to fight them on either side of him, right?
Not at the same place that he's being fought with the other person.
You don't want to stand in a nice line
so that he can hit you both with a spell at the same time.
Yeah, like how ninjas fight in movies is it's always one at a time
and then even though they're surrounded by other guys.
Everyone waits their turn.
All right.
So I'm going to use my Moistung Longsword
and take a swing at Mr. Rathmodar.
That is a 19.
Yes, you strike out at him
and swing into him and he disappears.
And he's behind you by 30 feet.
Seems like a fun parlor game he's playing.
All right.
I will throw my Dwarven Hammer at him.
My Dwarven Thrower, sorry.
It's the exact name for it.
So it's a 21.
Yes.
All right.
That's 14 damage.
You strike him square in the chest
and he must make a save for concentration, which he does.
And he gets knocked back by about 10 feet.
More wizards continue the ritual to bring Tiamat into the material plane.
And we're back to the top.
And it is Nularaaa's turn.
Roll a D10, please.
I was hoping it'd be longer until it was my turn so you might forget it.
Everybody's just very one single mind going on right now.
Yes.
It's a seven.
A seven.
Seven to eight.
The creature uses its action to make a melee attack
against a randomly determined creature within its reach.
If there is no creature within its reach, the creature does nothing this turn.
So that would be either Donnie or Flint.
So you will be rolling.
I hope it's me.
Let's say Flint is evens.
Donnie is odds.
Do you want to roll a D6 or something or do you want me to?
I can do it.
That's a four.
It's me.
I mean, you can take it more, so I'm kind of glad it's you.
Also, you get to choose your weapon, though, don't you?
Well, she means she's got the sword in her hand.
I mean, she would make the attack as if she was attacking anything.
Yeah.
And you guys are never going to trust me.
I'm constantly attacking you guys.
Oh, well, maybe I'm not because that's a 12.
Oh, yeah, that's not going to do it.
So you strike out, not really knowing what you're doing.
You strike out and you hit Flint in the back and get full armor.
I kind of turn around and give her like a what?
Does she look like she's confused at all?
Can I see anything different?
Oh, yeah, she's definitely confused.
All right.
OK, so that is my is that my first attack or this is a separate thing?
I think you tend at the start of its turn determines its behavior for that turn.
That's all you can do.
Oh, yeah, because if you roll something different, you can act normally.
Yeah, if you roll nine to ten, you can act normally.
OK, so I don't even get my other attack.
Nope.
Sweet F.A. OK.
So you've got to make a wisdom saving throw again.
Nine, you are still confused.
Perfect. Did you roll a D20 or did you roll the D10 again?
Yeah, I did roll a D10.
Wasn't I supposed to roll the D10?
No, D20. Sorry.
Roll a D20. Otherwise, that was an excellent roll.
That was an excellent roll.
Oh, well, this one wasn't.
It's a four. Oh, still confused.
It's still confused.
She's playing D&D how she plays D&D.
That's fact.
Story checks out.
OK, so where is Mr. Rathmodar now?
He is 40 feet ahead or 40 feet beyond where Flint is.
OK, well, assuming Donnie is still like with me, then he would be able to approach and then try to.
Well, first he'll try and recharge.
That's him trying to recharge, which he does.
Yay. Awesome.
So he will do another fire breath.
So that needs to be a dex save.
That's an 18.
Well, that will this Rath is he's been doing gymnastics or something.
He is very, very.
So that's 20, so 10, which I think is what happened last time.
His robes alight as he just misses the brunt of Donnie's flame.
And he eyes up Donnie for hitting him once more.
He's not looking great, though.
Thea, you're up.
God.
What are you doing?
What's that list that you're in?
None of your business.
Geez.
It's like appendix of animals.
I'm trying to make a good choice.
It's not going to happen this turn.
So I'm curious what's going to happen next.
I know me too.
I don't know.
But I am going to conjure animals.
I want to conjure eight Pteranodons.
Yeah, you do.
OK, tell me what it looks like when you cast this spell.
I kind of like crouched down on the ground and I have my hands on the earth and I'm trying to pull as much energy as I can from the earth around me.
And I just I raise my hands up into the air and I say.
Yeah.
And from from nothing, these eight Pteranodons come forth.
So as I see it, you're pulling energy from the world and wisps of this begin to form and you hear the cause or roars of these Pteranodons.
And you see Wrath look towards you and he raises his hand and he says, not today.
And they poof out of existence.
I'm going to fucking gut punch that motherfucking son of a god.
I scream.
And with that yell, I yell in my mind, but also kind of out like Glock.
And, you know, guacamole is going to come up through the tunnel and she start to make her way.
Climbing up the ladder.
Yeah.
Four rails.
Probably just like hopping up the rungs.
Just like, yeah.
Like how birds do on their little ladders and cages.
It's very cute.
So she's going to she's going to come up and fly her max distance, which is fly 60 feet.
The chants of the ritual begin resonating as the as the energy begins lifting the earth from the ground at the center.
You see stone begin to heave up in the center of this temple.
As the colors begin to get clearer and spin wildly.
It is Rath's turn.
He looks towards Flint and New Laura.
And you see from within his hands a ball of glowing fire begin to form.
He throws from his hands a bright streak of fire in a 20 foot radius sphere that encompasses you.
Well, Donnie as well.
You each must make a dexterity saving throw.
Donnie is immune to fire damage.
Well, then he doesn't, but he can still make it.
I got a 17.
I got a 17 and I'm also going to add my rabbit's foot into this bad boy.
So that's now a 19.
You both save.
However, you take half of this fire damage.
Cool.
Which is 8d6.
I think you read that wrong.
So you take half of 30.
So you take 15 fire damage.
And he begins to step closer to the center of the room.
The ritual continues to grow as Flint's turn comes.
All right.
He's how far away from me now?
It looks like he is about 40 feet.
I would like to once again throw my Dwarven Thrower.
Okay.
And I would like to since it knocked him backwards last time,
I'd like to throw it past him and maybe get him on the rebound this time
and maybe knock him closer to me.
Okay.
If that's an option.
Sure.
Maybe it depends on how good I roll.
Could be.
That's pretty good.
That's a 28.
So you whip it past him and he thinks you missed and looks towards you
and catches it in the back and takes.
I will roll.
Hang on.
Six and five is 11 damage.
You see the wind get knocked out of him.
He gets wide eyed as he flies towards you almost on this hammer.
Nularaaaa, your clarity comes back as he comes so close to you
that you see the life leave his eyes as he falls to the ground.
Thea is legit clapping from the other side of the cavern.
Just like, bravo, sir.
He was a dick indeed.
Yes, he was.
The one that's 50 feet above me then should be relatively directly overhead.
Yeah, you'd have to move.
You'd have to move a little bit, but more or less.
Okay.
Well, I'll move a little bit so that I'm directly under
just because my range of my weapon is not much more than 50 feet.
So I would like to be as close as possible.
Sure.
And I'll continue to throw that Dwarven Thrower up there
because you got to do something about this ritual.
Yeah, right?
The bowling for red wizards.
Yes!
Awesome.
You got it.
Okay.
Seven on the first one and another seven is 14 plus five is 19 points of damage.
You hit this wizard hard
and he loses concentration not only in the ritual
but on this flying ability that he has and he begins to fall down towards you.
Can I just like stand under him with my sword raised?
Sure.
He throws a hammer with one hand and then takes out a sword and just waits.
You're waiting as he falls.
He turns and he sees this coming as he impales onto the sword,
knocking it from your hand and falling to the ground,
dead, blood splattered on the floor.
Your sword now impaled deep within this wizard.
It's fair.
Gross but awesome.
Right?
You know what, I miss gross but awesome, you guys.
Can that be, I guess that can be your movement,
is like getting the sword out of the guy.
Oh, yeah.
Is that, can I use my last action to get the sword out of the dude?
Yep.
Perfect.
You're like, eww.
But it's a moist sword so it comes out quite easily.
There's a lot of, it's just a, as it comes.
Yeah, it does.
You notice the walls begin to shake.
As you hear a crashing thunderous sound break through the wall in front of you,
Flint, about 20 feet up the wall,
it seems like it's torn and falls in towards you.
Make a dexterity saving throw.
Alright.
That is a 15.
You dive out of the way, getting hit by small shrapnel and debris,
and you take six bludgeoning damage.
I'm gonna take three bludgeoning damage then.
You look, Nulara and Flint, you can see as the giant fortress moves past the building,
you see it's like an iceberg moving past when you're on a ship,
and from the outside you see three hippogriffs zip by.
Nulara has like a flash of her, all she wants to like be back.
Her best day ever.
Yeah, like back riding that hippogriff and maybe like when this is all over,
we can, you know, she can get back there.
Is there like a bat signal that we can shine through that hole in the wall to like call people to help?
I think they know.
The building begins to vibrate as the color begins to grow in intensity.
Nulara, it's your turn.
Okay, I'm gonna cast Conjure Barrage.
Okay.
And then I'm going to fire at the floating dude.
How far is he?
The big bad floating dude.
The big bad in the middle.
He's a hundred feet up from the center.
So if you want to be directly below him, you've got to get into the color.
No, I don't want to be below him.
So you're probably more like a hundred and thirty, a hundred and forty feet up.
So I am going to cast Conjure Barrage and then I am going to fire my crossbow at him.
Okay.
Is that a good reaction?
No, it was just a like flail throw.
It's a 24.
Yeah, 24 will hit.
So he will take the 1d8 from the real arrow.
Okay.
And then more arrows were conjured.
So he will also take an additional three more d8s.
16 plus one, 17.
Your arrow flies up and through this ritual being cast and it impales in his shoulder and you hear a booming.
So these arrows hit into his chest and side and he looks down and turns his attention to you with your next turn.
As a bonus action, I am going to vanish, which I can do.
Okay.
Bonus action, I can hide.
Okay.
So I can't move, but he can't or maybe I can move.
It doesn't say can't be tracked by non magical means unless I choose to be.
I don't think that makes you invisible.
No, that doesn't make you invisible.
But it makes me.
That means you got to go hide somewhere.
Like what is it?
What's the skill?
Yeah.
Hide.
Vanish.
Oh, vanish.
Vanish.
No, it's hide.
Hide is hide.
It's called hide and see.
Bonus action on your turn to hide.
Fuck, but there's nothing close enough for me to hide behind, is there?
Yeah, like closest is like the rubble in each of the, either right in the center, which is kind of being swirled up or in each of the spires.
Yeah, the center seems like a risky choice.
Seems real dangerous.
Yeah.
I'm going to leave that one up to you, but yeah.
So yeah, I mean, how I picture that one working is like there's things around you that you can just choose to.
Work better in a forest or something.
Yeah, if you were in the trees or something, it would be real helpful.
You're in an open chamber, really.
Damn it.
Sorry.
That's okay.
I wanted to work for you.
Nope, that's okay.
I wanted to work for me, too, because I remembered that I can do it, but that's fine.
Okay, that's fine.
Donnie is blessed with the gift of flight.
Got blessed.
Yeah.
Great. Donnie's recharge is fire breath.
And we're going to start making our way around the glowing center towards Thea.
Okay.
I guess, sure, because we're closer to that.
So the white guy's the next enemy to fight, right?
That way.
Sure.
Got it.
The chamber begins to resonate.
You sense a smile on Severin's face.
He fires down at Nulara.
You see coming towards you a glowing, flaming orb.
That is a 10 to hit.
That will not work.
Coming right over top of your head, hitting the wall behind you, an enormous eruption of
fire hits the wall, narrowly missing you.
And he begins to float down as the earth begins to heave even more.
And cracks begin to form as Flint's turn.
So he's still like 70 feet.
Do I not have a turn?
Did you not get a turn?
I haven't had a fucking turn in goddamn forever, and I didn't want to be that
player like, did my turn yet?
Sorry, your turn.
Yeah, your turn.
Thank God.
Sorry.
I had stuff I wanted to do.
Listen, I have a plan.
Okay.
Do your plan.
Okay.
You said there are hippogriffs flying through here now, yes?
No, not flying through.
They zipped past the outside.
You didn't see them either.
Oh fuckers.
That ruined my plan only a little bit.
Okay.
So here's what I'm going to do.
How far away am I from Severin?
He's 70 feet straight up from the center.
So you're probably like, I don't know, 100 feet away from him up.
100 feet up?
Yeah.
Okay.
Good.
What I'm going to do is I'm going to jump.
I'm just kidding.
If I move this way 30 feet first, that's squares.
So you're moving straight into the center of the heaving ground and churning lights.
Only a little bit.
Like there.
Right on the edge of it.
Yeah.
So now he's like 80 feet ahead of me?
Sure.
Okay.
I want to cast confusion on him because someone gave me acorns to do so.
Do it.
Okay.
I cast confusion.
He is going to need to have a wisdom saving throw.
That is a 20.
Okay.
Well, he can just go fuck himself.
Okay.
Guac flies 60 feet, but she's going to go around.
To the right or to the left?
She's going to go to the right.
60 feet?
60 feet.
Got it.
Nothing if my stuff works.
Get a little downtrodden.
Flynn, it's your turn.
I'm going to take my dash action to kind of end up where Rathmodar's dead body is on the map.
You got it?
Yeah.
I guess just I'll kind of keep moving along outside the middle, but that's about it.
A few things happen now.
The ground cracks open.
Light and fire begin to pour into the room.
At that moment, you hear a call of a dragon stick its head through the open wall, a giant red dragon.
But instantly before he releases his flame breath, it has a pained look and roar.
As he pulls back out and you see Lady Leral Silverhand, Lord Neverember, and Delaine firing everything they have at him to try and keep him off.
And in an instant, you see three glowing golden globes land at your feet.
They explode.
And an energy washes over top of you.
As you regain 70 hit points each and all of your spell slots, as the earth begins to shake and you hear a sickening roar.
And Severn yells, the time is now.
As the snout of the largest dragon you've ever seen starts to come into the chamber.
Light and fire pour into the temple of Tiamat.
You see the red snout followed by the green and the black and the white and the blue pour in.
Tiamat is here.
Your world has already ended.
Welcome to the end part, because I'm not going to put this in the middle.
It's going to be at the end.
Wow, what a departure from our normal.
Well, you know, we're getting down to it.
So I don't want the chance of any mentions or spoilsies to ruin a potential episode.
That's good call, because I never remember anything and I probably just say it offhandedly and ruin it totally.
So this is a good idea.
Yeah.
And this way, because it's at the end, we can say a big thank you to our single line Tiamat at the end of this episode, Sean Howard.
Thanks, Sean.
Our friendship is not at all altered by you playing this terrible character.
Yeah, well, I mean, it was just he just he just came on and said hello.
And that's the last we'll hear from him.
Yeah, right.
Probably.
But you can check Sean out.
He's going to be in next week's episode.
Maybe listen to that and then go check him out in the end of time and other bothers and Alba Salick.
So link his information down in the description.
He's also in the Facebook group.
But somebody else take over.
The Reckless Play Guild.
He's a gosh dang delight.
And you'll probably remember Sean from one of our live episodes when we were at PodCon.
He played one morning with us and was a delight.
Super delight.
And if that's how I like any word to describe Sean would be just delightful.
Delightful.
That man is delightful.
Yep.
Hey, we've got a Patreon special offer going on.
We want you to come join us over on Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
Join us.
It's not creepy.
It's not.
Join us.
There are stickers.
Join us.
It's honestly not as creepy as they're making it out to be.
It's not creepy at all.
Not at all.
I don't think we could describe our podcast as creepy.
So come to Patreon.
We have a special thing going on and there's special stickers and it's really fun over there and everyone's real nice.
And we've only got one more week.
I mean, you can still join us after that.
But one more week to get in on the special offer with the wonderful sticker pack, including the exclusive Patreon sticker of Flamikins on a Boat.
It's pretty super awesome.
Done by our good friend, Matt Garbutt.
How do people qualify for that sticker, Russ?
Signing up at the five dollar level or higher or be an existing patron and upgrading above where they currently are.
That's what upgrading means.
I mean, we're one thing.
We're graceful if we're not anything else on this podcast.
That's right.
Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
May 1st is the last day to get in on the exclusivity of this special offer.
And when you join Patreon, anytime you get bonus episodes and bonus content, and if you are above the two dollars level, you get to hang out with us once a month.
We do like a live stream.
We call it a gook hang.
I realize we always say gook hang and like those aren't words.
That's just our dumb bullshit.
We call a thing.
That's not what I mean.
Once like a year ago, kind of stock and I say we keep calling it that.
But in case you're wondering what the heck a gook hang is, we go on Google Hangouts and you can come and you can talk to us.
And we mostly like talk about we just nonsense, just a lot of nonsense.
But it's very fun.
It is.
There's so many more things on Patreon that you can get a hold of.
And we've got goals that we're trying to achieve so that we can bring you and patrons and everybody more fun content.
Maybe you don't have the money to go on Patreon.
And that's OK.
We love you so much anyway.
But maybe if you wouldn't mind doing us like a little pity favor, we'd really appreciate it if you could write a review or rate us.
That'd be really nice.
Some great people have already done that.
This one was let me face up on Facebook by one David Ginsburg.
He gave us five stars and he says one of my top five D&D actual play podcasts.
The crew of Dumbgeons and Dragons brings it every time.
And I am so excited to be a listener and a fan.
They're great to talk with.
And I enjoy getting to hear their continued adventures.
Thanks, David. Thank you.
Also, SpaceKey66 on Apple podcasts rated us five stars and said, I've binge listened to you guys for a month and a half and I'm almost caught up.
I've used some of your ideas in my own campaign and I'm thoroughly entertained by the debauchery that goes down.
You're doing the forgetfulness is hilarious.
I think you guys should start a podcast called Saving Private Thea.
Unintended.
Thank you, SpaceKey.
I agree with everything you said.
The forgetting is hilarious, right, Russ?
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
And just like on brand, totally done on purpose.
Everybody loves it.
Yeah.
When you guys don't remember what's going on.
Or the stuff we have or who we've talked to or what we've talked about.
All of that stuff.
This review is from Facebook from Zoe Mahoney.
I just found this podcast a few days ago, but I'm already on episode 12.
I seriously find this podcast super hilarious.
It's perfect for listening to on my car drives and for when I'm working on projects.
The group keeps it lighthearted, but also has a creative way of playing D&D with interesting twists.
The group also clearly has a great friendship and makes the gameplay even more fun with interesting banter.
Yeah, these guys are OK.
Yeah, you all are pretty great.
You guys are OK.
Just some of the best people.
Thank you all for those lovely, lovely reviews.
We're getting nearest to the end of our big list of reviews.
So if you wouldn't mind leaving a review, we would love that very much.
Links for everything mentioned today can be found in the description,
including the Dumbgeons and Dragons Discord and the Reckless Play Guild Facebook group,
where you can get to know us and in turn, we're going to get to know you.
A final thanks to Sirens Gate for some of the amazing atmosphere in today's episode.
Make sure you check them out at sirenscape.com to bring your games to life.
And the next episode will be out Wednesday, May 1st.
The arc finale of Dumbgeons and Dragons, this arc.
This one.
Yeah, we thought about the name a lot.
We came up with that poetic name.
Yeah, we've been working on it.
We slept on it.
We've been working on the title for three years.
It's why we kept fucking around in the game because we wanted to really get a good title.
Really had to nail it down.
The title is really everything.
Dumbgeons and Dragons this arc.
The next arc will be called that arc.
Oh, there it is.
Oh, yeah.
So that's next week and we're looking forward to it.
We hope you're looking forward to it.
This is the end of the episode now.
So we're going to say goodbye and we'll talk to you next week.
Have a great week.
Bye.
I said it for two hours for one line.
Now we're going into the next episode.
Okay.
All right.
Thank you.
Good night.
Thank you.
Bye.
I got to go.
Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.